I have to admit, I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed lately. It's my own fault, but it's still wearing on me. I really need to let myself fall into God's hands and accept that this is what HE has planned for me, easy or not, there is a method to his madness. I mean I can tell people over and over and over to believe that the Lord has a plan for you, but why am I not taking my own advice?
I also manage the website for our church, I've posted twice.
God’s Love says that I will protect you if: You know me, you walk with me , you trust me. If you do these things I will give you everything you need. 1 Peter 1:13-14.
The thing that gets me is that I feel so guilty for working all day and spend roughly 3 hours an evening with my kids, most of which is spent making dinner, homework, baths, cleaning, and preparing for tomorrow... There is such a lack of QUALITY time. In the same moment, as I've said before I love my job and I'm really good at it. There are things that reaffirm that daily.
I'm putting a lot on my plate and I know that, but that is my type A personality I suppose.
Financially things are a MESS... $20,000 in medical bills because the federal government can't get their crap together with our insurance, my husband who is jobless...which is getting to me a lot, the fact that I feel guilty for working because at least I have a job, the fact that I am blessed that I have so many kids when there are so many people out there that just want one.
I know what I need to do, I need to open my arms, open my heart, ask for forgiveness, ask for prayers, ask for guidance... and KNOW that through the loving Lord, HE will give me all that I need.
On another note, I heard something very disturbing today... a aquaitance of mine is getting ready to get a divorce. This after she turned her life around, became a devout Christian... Her words were so devastating. Really is this what "modern" churches are preaching?... She said: " It's ok for me to get a divorce, it's a way to fix a mistake I made..." Who is this person and where is she getting her knowledge of God's laws from? Anyway, please pray for her, and her husband...