GOOD MORNING! My lack of blogging over the last few weeks has been due to, well... Our WONDERFUL internet service provider.. So much for high speed right? A few weeks ago we experienced a LARGE snow storm knocking power out for several days, and our ISP has been on the frtiz ever since. They assure me... (I'm not holding my breath) that it will be fully functional today... We shall see... I certainly hope so though because I really need to send out an Angel Food email to all my customers.
I am getting anxious to find out what our little bean is... While again I would LOVE another daughter, I have to say that I really am feeling the baby boy itch... As long as it is healthy though, I'll be just as satisfied... I think it is knowing that this will probably be our last biological child also makes it more of a desire. I believe that God and my body are telling me that this is it... While we will love adopted children just as much as our own, there is something in my heart that really has the "itch" if you will. My best friend is having a girl, so how perfect would it be... an arranged marriage of sorts, lol.
I keeping with what I wanted this blog to be about originally I think I need to rewind a bit and take a look at what it is that makes a core family close. One thing that really struck me was... Why Big families are easier... at least from my eyes.
Big families are easier, because:
Patience: I have never had to teach patience, my children have learned I can't always drop everything. They have learned that there are many other people around who can assist.
Work Ethic: They have learned work ethic because there are always chores that need done in a small house packed with so many people. They also learn quickly that sometimes they have to clean up a mess that they didn't necesarily create. While this is always a work in progress, I belive that in the long run this will make them strong, motivated individuals.
Humility: My children have learned that it is not always their turn. They've accepted that they can't always get their way because others need time too. They have learned how to be competitive. While some say that this is not a good trait, we (hubby and I) firmly believe that it is. Being passive is by no means a negative trait, it is also VERY important to assert yourself and let others know that you are eyeing the prize as well.
Laughter: The children have learned to laugh often. They have learned that laughing just feels better when seven other people are doing it with you. Family game and movie nights remind me so much of this... especially when someone beats daddy!
Competition: I believe that this is a direct relection back to humility. Do I really need to go into this further? Everything is a competition in big families. The children compete over who can read faster, who's homework was done first, who cleaned their plate first...and on and on and on... Everything is a competition and they're ALL keeping score. While this may seem very child-like, you know the parents are just as guilty.
Balance: And I'm not talking inner/emotional balance. I am talking about physical balance. There are toys, clothes, stuffed animals, and a plethora of other child paraphernalia throughout the house. Balance takes skill.
Life isn't fair!: This is a literal meaning! Sometimes you just give it to the baby because a little peace and quiet goes a long way!
Just say "no": Being able to say "no" may be the most undervalued skill in the world. While it is human nature to give all you can... The need to be liked is pervasive, even as a parent, we want/need that approval from our kids. The need to be cool even more so these days. Thus, we have determined beginning with school shopping this year, our kids will now LOVE khaki, navy blue, and polo shirts... Having siblings teaches our children, not only do we say no, but how to use that sacred phrase 150 times a day with their siblings...
Praying: They learn that nothing beats prayer. I LOVE time that we spend praying together, I wish we did it more. Dinner time prayer, no matter in our own home or out at our favorite restuarant, and bedtime prayers are so special. They represent moments that the world around us stops and a chance for us to reflect on who really is important... the Lord. And while our church home isn't the ideal structure for our family, it is my firm belief that God has placed us here for a reason, so we push on. It is my pure hope that He will lead families our way so that we can begin to grow and serve in a new way!
Nature/Nurture: Having many children has taught me that nature has a lot to do with who your children are and who they will ultimately become. This thought is especially helpful when your children misbehave, or... well out right embarass you. Just blurt out "stupid nature!!!" and blame your husband's gene pool.
Name calling: This is inevitable. You occassionally call your child by someone elses name, it is no fair, time and time again no matter which child you want you seem to find a way to filter through everyone else first. The good thing to this is no matter what... Someone always shows up.
Spying: My children are learning that they can't get away with anything! There is ALWAYS someone watching them who, will tell on them... It keeps them on edge.
Friendship: They have many friends... and they all have the same last name. They'll be there forever, no matter what. One thing that I have learned is while we don't always agree with the methods or choices that our siblings make, one thing holds true, we love them and stick by them all the way! This is priceless.
LOVE: I think children, especially my children have learned to love because there are others around them to love and who love them. Aside from the time that we as parents spend dotting on each of them, sibling love is special, something no one else can ever take from them.